Toss some English in there , it’ll be cool.

                 Here in China we like to put random English on things to make them cool. My parents noticed the phenomena of many, many , many Chinese wearing t-shirts with English on it. Many of the shirts are bizarrely translated random Chinglish and some are normal , mostly odd though. Some are even crazy , one friend recalls seeing a very cute little kid wearing a very cute little Pop-eye t-shirt, she wanted to get one for her own child until she saw the back where it said  “If you like my boobs , wait till you see my balls.” WTF?!?!? What does that even mean?!?! Ladyboy child?? Huh?!? Moms and Dads let this be a lesson to check what you buy if it has a foreign language. For all you round eyes out there that means be careful when getting a tattoo with Chinese characters. Maybe one you think looks cool actually means idiotic horse pumpkin.

            I’m writing this because I bought a notebook just covered in random stuff purely because I liked the randomness. I guess the method works haha.Aighty I’m gonna type it out verbatim.

“THE, A wonderful pain relieving compound brewed only from the finest cider apples.”

“Work and play do not contradict each other: in fact , they complement each other. As the saying goes. “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” A life burdened with work leads you nowhere , for you would get tired and bored with your daily routine work. On the other hand , proper reaction will relieve the tension and discomfort of our monotonous life because it offers you various ways to let out your pent-up emotions.”

“Now I have a new plan for using my time wisely , I have set my alarm clock ahead half an hour. This will give me a head start on the day. I have also decided to keep a log of what I do and when I do it. Looking back on what I’ve done will give me some ideas on how to reorganize my time.”

“YOUR LOVE IS COMFORT IN SADNESS QUIETNESS IN TUMULT REST IN WEARINESS HOPE IN DESPAIR.”

“LEARNING A LIFELONG CAREER.”

“GOOD LUCK. The rabbit.”

“Urban Landscape”

        “As food is to the body , so is learning to the mind. Our bodies grow and muscles develop with the intake of adequate nutritious food. Likewise, we should keep learning day by day to maintain our keen mental power and expand our intellectual capacity. Constant learning supplies us with inexhaustible fuel for driving us to sharpen our power of reasoning, analysis, and judgement. LEarning incessantly is the surest way to keep pace with the times in the information age , and an infallible warrant of success in times of uncertainty.”

    Now a Chinese person definitely did not write this. These passages are not fraught with grammatical errors , nonsensical sentences, and is without misspellings. This was probably just cobbled together from random quotes on the internet, I’m betting the person who copied them didn’t really understand the sentences. Though they do kinda relate to each other , with the exception of the first one. Does any one know of any pain relieving compounds brewed from cider apples (only the finest!) ? Alcoholic cider? Drink enough Woodchuck and kill the pain? Haha

So ya know I’m not making it up , I’ll get around to writing about Beijing one of these days.

 

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